Movie time with leisure suit Larry

True Story - although not the REAL Leisure suit Larry ( I mean he is a virtual character), Larry (not his real name) did have greasy hair and that used car salesman swagger. Oh wait - he WAS a used car salesman!

Every time this happens I swear to the dating God's over a pint of Ben and Jerry's chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and a couple glasses of diet coke that I will NEVER ever go out on a date with another man that I meet on line evArrrrrrrrrrrrr. Well, that normally lasts until my last bite of ice cream and swig of soda. The cycle never ends. As if Leisure suit Larry's greasy head, used car salesman swagger and Skeletor-ish good looks weren't enough, his idea of a first date was a movie.

Outstanding!

I think its common knowledge that a first meeting/date/whatever should never be a movie. Why on earth would you go to the movies? Let's break this down:

1. You can't talk. Well you really shouldn't talk - you know "don't create your own soundtrack - the movie already has one"?. So, if we do go to the movies and you try to hold a conversation with me about anything ESPECIALLY the movie, I guarantee popcorn will be crammed down your external auditory canal so you cant hear shit. On the bright side you may have a snack later when you pick the kernels out.
2. You can't gaze into each others eyes because you're sitting side by side. At best you go to one of the snazzy stadium seating theaters where the arm rest lifts and if you're not too nervous you can cop a feel with the "accidental" arm or leg rub.
3. You can't play footsies, for the reason stated above - you're sitting side by side. I might be able to kick the hell out of you as I gracefully cross my legs, but that's about it.

With all that said - THANK THE LORD we went to the movies!!!! I don't think I could have gazed into "Larry's" eyes, the greasy hair would have been distracting.