Men who have "kitty kats" (figuratively speaking)

I'm a woman of the millennium, I'd like to think I'm independent. I take care of myself and don't expect or need a man to take care of me monetarily (its certainly nice if they have the ability to, but that's neither here nor there). I consider myself a mixture of modern woman and old fashioned.

I've found that I don't like men that complain. It's MY job to bitch and complain, that's a woman role. Being that I am a bit old fashioned means, in my book, that a man should be manly. You can show emotion, I appreciate that, but if your life ALWAYS sucks and all you can do is be down and out and complain - leave me out of it. Your job is to make ME happy, and listen to ME bitch and moan as I see fit (and I don’t do that often). And oh yes......

CHIVALRY IS NOT DEAD!! (at least I hope not)

So I've determined the following....

Man Roles:

• Take out the trash so I have room to throw away your crap.
• Change the light bulbs when they burn out so I can see what the hell I'm cooking you for dinner.
• Make sure my car runs (oil, tune ups, etc) so I can buy groceries and cook for your ass.
• Open car doors for me so I feel special and like I'm #1 and don't think about all the other chicks you have on your myspace top friends.
• Listen to me bitch, moan and complain (on the occasion that I do) and LIKE it. Humor me without making me feel like you're humoring me, I can tell if you are. If you cheer me up, rewards for you will follow. (I don't think men realize this)

Woman roles (i.e. things I do):

• Cook dinner for you so you don't have to go to that chicks house you met last week.
• Wash your clothes so I don't have to see your doo doo stains in your boxers.
• Keep your drinks filled or a beer in hand so you don't have to get up off your lazy butt.
• Keep the house clean so you don't feel like you're living with your ex, you left her for a reason right?

Is that too much to ask? I do know this - there shouldn’t collectively be any decision making without any consultation – that’s the millennium woman speaking. That is a deal breaker, especially if money is involved.....and don't be mad if I make more than you - I'll still cook and clean and wash the doo doo out of your boxers.