Can the fear of completely losing something you TRULY love make somebody just turn their life around with the blink of an eye? Sure the question can be asked if you TRULY loved this "thing" in the first place, why was it taken for granted. I suppose we all do things for one reason or another. The human psyche is a complex beast. I take for granted breathing. If someone came up to me and tried to suffocate me, you can damn sure believe that I would fight for my life and be thankful for the ability to breathe after that.
Yes I LOVE to breathe, because yes I love living, I don't want to die. I have too much left to do.
If I'm someones breath and I was taken for granted for SO long, and I was suddenly removed, not by my choice, but because of something they did......They took the simple ability to breathe and the fact that air would always be available for granted and did something horrible. However, they woke up and decided to fight tooth and nail for their life - should they be allowed to breathe again?
September 8, 2008
September 5, 2008
Too little too late?
A dozen roses, a teddy bear, an apology poem? Is it all in vain? It certainly seems that way. I'm sure the remorse and regret are there NOW, just as the huge ego and conceit were there all along. The certainty that I would never go anywhere when I was being played like a fool and taken for granted. It was so set in stone that I was the rock that would never move no matter what storm came through.This is all so much deeper though.
Please believe I'm not a bible thumper or a fanatically religious person at all. I just tend to read passages when I need guidance or go through a hard time, because hey, like most people I do believe in a higher power - and believing in something gets us all through rough times. Last one I read was about forgiveness. We should forgive people not seven, but up to seventy-seven times. I can definitley forgive - in time, but does forgiving mean that I can go on and be with that person again? Can someone truly change?
September 2, 2008
Nope, it's not enough
Love is simply not enough.
You can love me until your face turns purple.
You can ask me if I know that you love me every day.
You can tell me you love me morning noon and night 7 days a week.
Love is simply not enough.
Lasting love takes compatibility, commitment, chemistry, and communication.
Real love is sane and pure and grounded, it's stable, it's secure.
There is NO reason in the world for me to put up with a man who has another woman telling him that she loves him and he is telling her the same REGARDLESS of the reason.
NO EXCUSE.
You can love me until your face turns purple.
You can ask me if I know that you love me every day.
You can tell me you love me morning noon and night 7 days a week.
Love is simply not enough.
Lasting love takes compatibility, commitment, chemistry, and communication.
Real love is sane and pure and grounded, it's stable, it's secure.
There is NO reason in the world for me to put up with a man who has another woman telling him that she loves him and he is telling her the same REGARDLESS of the reason.
NO EXCUSE.
September 1, 2008
The ULTIMATE Betrayal....
Betrayal, a form of deception or dismissal of prior presumptions, is the breaking or violation of a presumptive social contract (trust, or confidence) that produces moral and psychological conflict within a relationship amongst individuals, between organizations or between individuals and organizations.
A relationship is essentially a social contract. You tell someone you love them and that you want to spend the rest of your life with them and with that the possibility of an eventual marriage is there.
A long distance relationship is a social contract - with a few caveats. No where in the long distance relationship contract does it say that one party or the other can take on another boyfriend/girlfriend and whisper sweet nothings in their ear and smother them with kisses and affection. That belongs to ME! Call me crazy but I can forgive a slip up here and there given a long distance situation - because Lord knows I'm not perfect, however, I have never been in love with one person (after the age of 24 - yes I was young and dumb once too) and told ANYONE else that I love them also. Finding something like that out, seeing those words, concrete proof from the person you love dearly and have dedicated the last (almost) 2 years of your life to, is absolutely devastating.
Pure DEVASTATION. I'm not really sure how I'm functioning right now because I am absolutely heart broken and devastated. I'm glad I found the evidence, however I hate that I did, because in a relationship you shouldn't have to feel the need to go looking for anything. I hate that I have to move on because we are BEST friends and are perfect together, but I KNOW that I have to. There is no reason for me to stick around and be taken for granted and deal with the deceit and potential heartache any longer....because surprise surprise!....I have forgiven him before. It wasn't quite as heart wrenching as this situation so I was able to move past it, but THIS, this one just ripped my heart out of my chest.
I think his reaction is typical too. He's sorry, apologetic, swears it was stupid and none of the words he said to her meant anything. It's me that he's in love with and wants to be with. Please forgive him and give him another chance. I keep telling myself that he's only doing all this because he got caught....its the truth....otherwise, it would continue to be the same old routine. Telling me the -I love you's- on the phone as he's on his way out the door to go spend the night and cuddle with her, while I'm half a world away laying in bed alone.
A relationship is essentially a social contract. You tell someone you love them and that you want to spend the rest of your life with them and with that the possibility of an eventual marriage is there.
A long distance relationship is a social contract - with a few caveats. No where in the long distance relationship contract does it say that one party or the other can take on another boyfriend/girlfriend and whisper sweet nothings in their ear and smother them with kisses and affection. That belongs to ME! Call me crazy but I can forgive a slip up here and there given a long distance situation - because Lord knows I'm not perfect, however, I have never been in love with one person (after the age of 24 - yes I was young and dumb once too) and told ANYONE else that I love them also. Finding something like that out, seeing those words, concrete proof from the person you love dearly and have dedicated the last (almost) 2 years of your life to, is absolutely devastating.
Pure DEVASTATION. I'm not really sure how I'm functioning right now because I am absolutely heart broken and devastated. I'm glad I found the evidence, however I hate that I did, because in a relationship you shouldn't have to feel the need to go looking for anything. I hate that I have to move on because we are BEST friends and are perfect together, but I KNOW that I have to. There is no reason for me to stick around and be taken for granted and deal with the deceit and potential heartache any longer....because surprise surprise!....I have forgiven him before. It wasn't quite as heart wrenching as this situation so I was able to move past it, but THIS, this one just ripped my heart out of my chest.
I think his reaction is typical too. He's sorry, apologetic, swears it was stupid and none of the words he said to her meant anything. It's me that he's in love with and wants to be with. Please forgive him and give him another chance. I keep telling myself that he's only doing all this because he got caught....its the truth....otherwise, it would continue to be the same old routine. Telling me the -I love you's- on the phone as he's on his way out the door to go spend the night and cuddle with her, while I'm half a world away laying in bed alone.
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